"The promises of commitment does not make sense in the long run [...]. Like any other type of investment, have ups and downs. So, if you want to build relationships, keep the necessary distance, if you want your being together is rewarding, you do not offer or ask for commitment. Always leave all doors open.
Residents of Leonia, one of Calvino's Invisible Cities, say, when questioned about it, that their passion is 'the enjoyment of new and different things'. In fact, every morning the people 'wearing brand-new robes, extracts from the most sophisticated refrigerator still unopened tins, listening to the latest nursery rhymes of the last product model'. But every morning 'the remains of yesterday's Leonia await the chariot of spazzaturaio', so that one wonders if the real passion of leoniani rather than being 'the eject, remove the self, the world of a recurrent impurity' '.
Z. Bauman, Liquid Love , Laterza, 2004.
The ease and convenience of the hallway, I think. Every time I read
Bauman me want to cry. This sociologist has eighty-five years and a lot of things to teach.
Talk network and how it has transformed relationships. But this is an old story and now there are whole libraries on this issue. It is known that the term 'network' indicates a context in which it is easy to enter and exit easy. Quoting Vasco Brondi I can think of a phrase that says "do not have to be with me at all." I do not ask anything, and you, please, do the same.
addition to the 'virtual relationships', increasingly widespread and disturbing, there is another aspect that has greatly changed the relationship between human beings. It's called insecurity.
existential uncertainty that has made us more than humanly weak, unable to make decisions when you include the other. Bauman would say that there are "individualized" and then everyone thinks for himself. We want many people around, we want many friends, too many perhaps. One hundred, two hundred.
Social relations seem to work better since there is Facebook. 180 million individuals who have given their lives to a social network, maybe it's just a gimmick to fuck all, guinea pigs and reduce us to study our profiles. A huge marketing experiment in which we do not notice it either.
continue to expose ourselves, exhibit, all in a big window and then back out and feel the anguish of real contact, the one with the people we meet body to body.
crisis, job insecurity have made the man incapable of forming relationships real, stable and durable.
not find work, are graduates, young people sent resumes everywhere and found nothing. None. So maybe I'll have to go and I go to leave this fucking town where I was born, my parents, my friends, my girlfriend and this sea. No, I would not tie myself to the people.
know I was wrong, wrong. My ex left me and I suffered for years. Since then I have never linked to anyone. And I do not know where to go, certainly not stay here for life, so why tie? Meanwhile I see a lot of people, but when I know a girl that I like I avoid to get attached because you never know.
The squalor of love relationships in the post-modern. Vacuum.
Then I reminded him again, Vasco Brondi. He sums up the whole way:
"What to tell children that we have, these fucking year zero?"
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